The sweet in the bitter

For a while now, I have noticed that some kind of bitterness has become part of my normal state of mind. And along with that emotion there is a sense of satisfaction that is unfamiliar. This might be an odd thing to say, but I have started to realize that it actually is possible to go as far as you want. In that I feel bitterness. I have nothing to cling on to anymore. I am not even sure that I will go as far as I want, and that makes me frightened...and then bitter. To be quite frank, it's a decent feeling, I now know that I don't have to try so hard. I can do whatever I want to do. You can judge me, but you can't hurt me.